December 21, 2015

Star Wars + Christmas = Magic

It's the most wonderful time of the year! I've never been so excited about Christmas. It's so true that it's even better as a parent. AG is downright giddy with all the anticipation of what Santa will bring. I have a feeling he might go overboard but of course we will have to wait a few days to know for sure. She's still asking Saucy to let Santa know she wants lots of makeup like mommy and barbies. Real barbies. With a Barbie house. 
Hubby and I had a date night this past weekend. It was much needed and so fun. We had dinner at Bonefish followed by the best movie experience I've ever had. We saw Star Wars in IMAX 3D! I won't spoil anything and just say it was awesome. So awesome. Well written, great acting, I hope Abrams does all of the new ones. There were storm troopers at the theater when we arrived but we had to hurry in to get good seats and after the movie they were gone so no photos. But we might have to go again and see what it's like in 2D so maybe they will be there then. Everyone in our theater was so pumped up. The energy was fantastic. I loved being a part of something so special. We ordered tickets in advance from Fandango and you should know that you have to wait in line at the theater just like everyone else when you do that. I would not recommend it unless you're trying to get tickets for the opening weekend of a huge movie that'll likely be sold out. Or if you have a good coupon. Otherwise the convenience fee really isn't worth it. 
Speaking of convenience, you know what's great about three year olds (or at least ours)? They love to help. AG has learned to vacuum fairly well and it is awesome. 

She was a big helper with decorating the tree too. 
I haven't let her help with wrapping because when I showed her one of the things I got her daddy she woke up the next morning and the first words she spoke to him were "Daddy! Mommy got you Christmas shorts!" No kidding. I heard her over the monitor. I used the talk feature and told her not to tell him what his presents are. Thankfully that's all she saw and I won't confirm exactly what they are. I told him they are sparkly red and green with glitter and a grinch on the bottom. He might not believe me. 

December 10, 2015

Meet Saucy

I am so excited to say that we've started a new tradition. Meet Saucy!
She arrived this past Saturday with a book and a pair of jammies for AG. She was so sweet and fixed the elf ornaments that had been broken even if she dumped out all my glue sticks in the process. Silly elf. 
After reading the book, we spent some time discussing name options and ultimately left it up to AG. She went in her own direction and proclaimed that her elf's name is Saucy. Seriously? Where did she come up with this? She's so funny. So Saucy it is. It was a little more clear when a few days later she named the boy elf on her new "saucy jammies" Basghetti. So Saucy and Basghetti. I believe we have a foodie on our hands. As if that wasn't already obvious.
So my elf game has been pretty strong thus far. And I might've peeked early with the one where she rode the remote control helicopter into the Christmas wreath. You'll see. AG is loving the elf and she's so excited every morning to go find Saucy. It makes my mommy heart so happy. 
I love when she talks to Saucy and tells her what to tell Santa. She has asked for "lots of makeup like mommy", Cinderella and Ariel dresses, barbies and a barbie house and a barbie sink (you can't make this up), and a big barbie house. She's very specific which makes me nod my head and think "yep, that's my kid."
Here's most of what we've caught Saucy doing so far...

this is AG's own personal tree upstairs in her "puzzle room" - I think its important that you know she decorated it by herself.

the helicopter was stuck in the tree this morning

this is right now - disregard my messy kitchen #reallife
*Not pictured is a bubble bath in AG's extra sink in cotton balls. It was super cute but I never have my phone or camera upstairs. I'll do better. Maybe. Probably not.

Do you have an elf friend? I'd love to know what your little ones have been most excited to see your elf doing. Leave me a comment with some ideas!

December 4, 2015

Sometimes Real Life is Hard - Ectopic #2

I've written this post about 16 times in my head. And no matter how many times I mentally write it, I can never figure out how to start so I'm just doing it. I don't like it but thankfully this isn't a post on "how to write a world class intro". Honestly, this whole thing reads a little choppy to me and I'm just going to be ok with that. I'm not trying to write a deep feelings-y post that'll go viral. I really like having this blog to look back on over the years and I look forward to sharing it with AG one day when she's older. So let's just get to it.
I had surgery one week ago. It was definitely the worst Black Friday I've ever had. I'd rather stand in line at WalMart with the crazies. About a month ago we had a wonderful surprise in the form of a positive pregnancy test. (Don't get excited, this doesn't end well.) To fully understand this you need a bit of history.
Before AG, we had 3 failed pregnancies. Two miscarriages and an ectopic (located in my right tube) which was removed via laparoscopic surgery on the same date as the flood, 3 years prior. April 29 is not a good date for us. With AG, I was on clomid, estrogen, and progesterone and obviously this led to a healthy pregnancy. In the course of trying for number two, I've taken these medications (the "fertility cocktail" is what my midwife calls it) for quite a few cycles with no results. We discontinued the meds for several reasons. The main one being, they make me an actual crazy person. I called them my crazy pills. I believe progesterone is the main one that helped sustain our healthy pregnancy with AG so that's the one I kept on hand in case I became pregnant. I also use Progessence Plus from Young Living daily. This helps me maintain a normal level of progesterone. It's a fine line between lethargic and having other low progesterone symptoms and being a hormonal crazy person.
So after trying for months unsuccessfully then finally giving up we actually got pregnant. Just like people always say, which by the way, if you're talking to someone who's having fertility struggles, do not tell them that "it'll happen when you stop trying" or "it'll happen when you least expect it." We hate that. So we were both so surprised to see that positive test. When I told hubby he said "what? how?" Despite how this ends I still think that's really funny.
I felt good at first. We were cautiously optimistic. We told AG right away and she was delighted. She so wants to be a big sister. I want this for her too. So bad. Because of my history, I have blood work done immediately. My first test came back at HCG of 30. Which is extremely low. But, 72 hours later it was up to 91. That's a doubling time of 44ish hours. Which is perfect. We scheduled an ultrasound and carried on. The numbers were low but they were rising appropriately.
A week after that I was at work one day, a Wednesday, and I started feeling some discomfort. Then it rapidly evolved into pain. It became so severe I knew I needed to go home. At one point on my way out I was in the bathroom fighting the urge to get sick and I was literally on the bathroom floor because the pain and nausea were so severe. In hindsight, driving myself home was probably not my finest decision. The pain peaked as I was driving and arriving at home. I had some bleeding that seemed to correlate with the peak of the pain. The pain, nausea, and bleeding all tapered off. I spoke with my midwife and she told me to go to the hospital for stat lab work. My wonderful mother in law came to my house and drove me to the hospital for lab work. The results came back at HCG of 726 which was spot on for doubling every 48 hours. Based on past experience I know that with a miscarriage the HCG drops off rapidly and with an ectopic it doesn't double correctly. I felt normal again for the next couple days.
Over the weekend, I had more light bleeding. I went in Monday for more stat blood work and my HCG was 1134. Which means it was not doubling correctly. I knew right then. Ectopic. But without further testing we couldn't be sure. The next step was more bloods after 48 hours. That one came back at 1400ish. This pretty much sealed the deal. Plus during the ultrasound process we saw what looked like a gestational sac right beside my left ovary. That pain from the previous Wednesday, was radiating down my left leg. Ugh. I knew. I knew it had to be ectopic. A phone call later from the doctor who had performed my previous ectopic surgery made everything very real. I told him I didn't want the methotrexate shot. Last time my tube was very close to rupturing and if I'd taken the shot I would've lost my tube. That put a fear in me. I'd rather risk general anesthesia and laparoscopy than risk losing my tube. Plus with the MTX shot you have to wait at least 3 months to conceive again due to the risks to a future baby. While I have my doubts that we would conceive that quickly anyway, that risk just scares me.
So the day after Thanksgiving, my sweet doctor came into the hospital on his weekend off and did the laparoscopy to remove my ectopic pregnancy. It was a rough couple days. I hate the whole process. It's a tough pill to swallow when you've been trying to conceive for about a year and you finally do as a surprise and then it sticks in the wrong place and has to be removed. And no, there is no way to relocate it. Trust me, I asked the first time we went through this.
This past week has been a thankfully uneventful recovery time. AG and hubby have been great helps. My mom came for surgery day and again on Sunday when hubby had to go to work. She was a wonderful help and even made us a delicious pot roast. It's Thursday night now and I'm finally off of my strong pain medication. At this point I'm only sore when moving and not so sore that I need to take anything. I am however, so so itchy. Instead of stitches, he used some kind of magic medical glue to seal up my incisions. And as a bonus, when it's healing, it's crazy itchy.
So now I've had an ectopic in both my right and left tubes. According to my vast internet research this puts me at a 50% chance for future pregnancies to be ectopic. We will know more after I have a dye test done in 5 weeks. It's called a hysterosalpingogram or HSG test. Should be tons of fun. Or invasive and uncomfortable. But I'll be glad to have the answers it provides. From there we will know if it's even safe for us to try and conceive naturally or if we need to explore IVF. IVF would be the only way for an embryo to avoid the apparently dangerous journey that is my tubes. It's both scary and appealing. Now that I've gotten this first post out there I'll continue to keep you updated on our journey. This will be a good outlet for me and a way to keep everyone updated at the same time.