Wife: reciprocates goodnight, pees, brushes teeth, washes face, applies face products, removes contacts, pees again, sets computer to virus scan, checks laundry is drying, endures all doors are locked, retrieves items from deck, locks doors again, turns off all lights, checks to make sure coffee maker is set for morning (it is; she did it earlier), gets water for bedside table, turns off tv, gets headphones to watch tv until snoring stops, collects water and phone, moves air freshener to different room, pees one last time, goes to bed to lay awake until the snoring ends, writes blog post because she needs to vent about the snoring and the fact that husband can fall asleep in mere seconds, prays for snoring to stop, prays in general, prays for snoring to stop some more, pulls covers to make snorer roll, watches tv on phone in bed, goes to sleep, gets up in the night with toddler who is sweaty/wet/needs to pee/not tired/thirsty*, pees again, refills water depending on time, back to sleep depending on time.